January 27
Alison Willcocks was born on July 22nd 1952. She is Head of Bedales, a coeducational public school in Hampshire famous for its progressive approach to educating teenagers. She has been a senior inspector of independent schools, chairman of HMC's Coeducational Group, a member of the National Standards for Boarding working party and she writes and lectures regularly on a variety of educational themes. She is married to a teacher and has two children and four stepchildren. Her first child was born on this day in 1980.
If you love something, set it free -
a tip from Alison Willcocks
If you love something, set it free. If it comes
back to you, it's yours. If it doesn't, it never was. We do not possess
anything in this world, least of all other people. We only imagine that
we do. Our friends, our lovers, our spouses, even our children are not ours;
they belong only to themselves. Possessive and controlling friendships and
relationships can be as harmful as neglect.
Alison Willcocks adds: This ancient Chinese proverb articulates a powerful truth about the importance of letting go. It had a profound effect on me when I first heard it, and it has guided me in both my private and professional life ever since. I have often quoted it as an excellent model for parenthood, which is a gradual, wonderful - and sometimes painful - process of letting go. It begins with the cutting of the umbilical cord and ends when you hand over the keys of your car. They will fly the nest, but if you freely and willingly let them go then they will always come back.
© This tip appears here as an advertisement for the 400-page charity fundraising anthology Seize the Day (£12.00, published by Chatto & Windus, Random House UK Ltd) edited by Nicholas Albery and Stephanie Wienrich. This tip is protected by copyright and appeared in the book with kind permission of the author and may not be reprinted without the permission of the publishers. For the full acknowledgement credits see this book. It is available for advance mail order by credit card for £13.99 including UK postage and packing (slight extra elsewhere). It makes a wonderful and much appreciated present.